My Courageous Brother

Always too cool for us...someday maybe he'll teach me his ways

I know my posts don't tend to be on the serious side, but I have to post what is going on in our lives, and sometimes it's not all glitz and glamour, contrary to popular belief.

Lately, life has been a roller-coaster.  As some people might know, my brother - Ben - is in his 5th battle with cancer at the age of 31.  It is scary seeing a family member so sick and enduring so much suffering.  It's terrifying hearing the medical professionals have grim outlooks for his prognosis.  And even though we all have faith, it is hard to not waver when things look so grim.

THANKFULLY, fasting, prayers and priesthood blessings really work, miracles happen and he is still with us, and slowly improving.  Still fighting the fight and pushing forward.  And while it has been sad and scary, it has made me appreciate how incredibly strong and supportive my family is.  We have experienced some amazing things together, and we are all moving forward with the plan to create very happy memories with each other.

Here is a history I stole from my sister-in-law's blog...hope she doesn't mind:

"Ben had cancer in 2002. Synovial sarcoma. It was a tumor in his shoulder that grew extremely fast. It went from undetectable to a grapefruit size within a month. He was diagnosed a few months after we were engaged and he started chemo the Monday after we were married. After chemo, radiation and surgery, Ben was free of the cancer. The chemo didn't seem to affect it at all and the radiation did not shrink it either. The surgery was the only thing that seemed to work. 

One year passed. Then 3 years. Then we were at Ben's 5 year cure date celebrating his victory over cancer.

Fast forward to 8 years, just enough time for Sara to finish her education. Ben's tight breathing provoked a chest x-ray which showed a baseball size tumor in his left lung.

This was a big shock. How could it be back? It's been 8 years?

Over the next year and a half, Ben would suffer through multiple hospitalizations, 2 lung surgeries and would find another completely different aggressive cancer in his thyroid, which also resulted in a surgery to remove his thyroid and the surrounding lymph nodes. During this time as well as following it Ben would have multiple ER visits in addition to radioactive iodine therapy and more chemotherapy that he had previously swore he would never do again because of how traumatic it was. Cancer changes things.

Now we are looking into the hospital room where the doctors can't figure out why Ben has such severe abdominal pain, is swelling all over his body, can't breath and can't keep anything down. Call it divine intervention or just a smart doctor, an echocardiogram is ordered to look at the function of his heart. The echo technician quickly called down to the doctor that would read the report to make sure he didn't go home before reading it. Very shortly after, Ben's cardiothoracic surgeon came to the hospital room and stated that Ben needed to have fluid around his heart drained because he had cardiac tamponade, so much extra fluid around his heart that it was collapsing his right atrium. Left untreated this is fatal.

Following the drain placement, Ben felt "funny" in his chest but it was a good funny because he could now breath easier and he started getting better from then on. The pain in his abdomen subsided. The emptiness he felt after the draining was a result of a long process of fluid accumulation that was caused by the cancer in his lung, now encroaching on his heart and displacing it to the right side of his body. Additionally, the cancer has spread from his lung down through his diaphragm and into his abdomen pushing his spleen out of position and compressing his stomach.

And through all this we still have hope. We still have plans for our future.

We recognize all the prayers in Ben's behalf and know they have helped.

We believe that God gave us the ability to keep ourselves as healthy as possible as well as help cure ourselves. So we are going to do our part in trying to heal Ben and then leave the rest up to God. 

His will be done in all things."

So I guess, what I really wanted to post is how amazingly courageous my brother is.  Ben has endured more than I can imagine, and yet he keeps on going.  He is so kind and patient during it all, which just blows me away.  Even when we go to visit him, he asks about our lives, what is new with us and our plans for the future. He asks the kids about their summer plans and what they've been up to.  He doesn't like attention and people fussing over him, but he deserves some recognition for all that he has done!  

And his wife, Sara...wow, what an amazing lady!  She just never wavers and keeps plugging along, being Ben's 100% support.  We don't know how we all lucked out to get her in our family, but we sure are grateful!  

We just hope to have 1/2 as much faith and courage as those two.

We love you both!